Back to Normalcy/An Unravelling

After the most stressful, hurtul, eye-opening day at work that I’ve ever had, ever, I scooted my butt pretty much straight up to the barn (of course talked to bestie for a moment first). At this point I would say I was feeling numb to the whole situation and just wanted to be with my horse.

 

S was still teaching one of the girls, so I got to take my time getting Vinny ready for our lesson. I brushed and curried him to perfection and sprayed him with a little show sheen just for the heck of it. He really is so handsome.

 

KR was in the ring with Roxy during this time working on their jumping. I was quite impressed with her. She went from never seeing a jump to jumping small lines in a very short amount of time. What a good girl.

 

Vinny and I took our time warming up. We did a lot of trotting and changes of direction. He still acts up sometimes in the walk to trot transition but definitely not as bad as before.

 

I did think that S was going to go pretty hard on me since I hadn’t had a lesson in 3 weeks, but he didn’t! We just did our warm up and in that S seemed to be concentrating on my upper body position most of the time.

 

One of the barn moms showed up to chat so the three of us took a good 20 minute break to talk and catch up. I had a lot to talk about with S since learning some exciting news that is in the process of coming together…. I’ll get to that hopefully in the next couple of weeks. ;) :P :O

 

Finally, we got to jump a small crossrail line. Vinny was so very good. The only thing we really need to concentrate on is keeping him balanced through the turn after the last fence. He tends to throw his inside shoulder in quite a bit to the point where I have to really squeeze and almost leg yield him over. Any tips for this?

 

I would say the only bad part of the night was that I lost an ear pom!!! Boo. L

 

It appears that I will be having another lesson on Wednesday to make up for last week. I am hoping it goes just as well as last night.

 

Back to the job. I’m not quite sure how I feel about working here any more. Basically I’ve learned the hard way that no one is trustworthy, and I really cannot be the kind, loving person that I try to be if I want to survive here. After three years here, it seems that I am the only one who hasn’t been putting up a façade on the job. What a shame. I guess that is life? Or does such a job of honesty and kindness exsist?

 

I am trying my best to pray a lot, concentrate on people that I love and love me, and the things that make me truly happy (Vinny) during this time of heart-searching. Any love, kind thoughts and prayers would be appreciated.